Rear View Mirror
You know how sometimes, you can listen to what someone’s saying, but completely miss what they’re saying? That happened to me at church this weekend. And I’m about to pass it on to you. So brace yourselves – I’m going to share a tidbit of wisdom from my pastor, that I’m taking totally out of context and applying to a completely different situation.
Yesterday at church, our pastor brought up the fact that he’s teaching his 16-year-old how to drive. And while it is necessary to teach her to look in the rear view mirror, he’s struggling to make sure that she remembers that you just look in the rear view mirror briefly. She can’t just look in the mirror and leave her gaze there. No, when you’re driving, your eyes have to be on the road in front of you, with only quick glances in the rear view mirror – glances that help make your drive a safe one.
He then launched into wonderful sermon, I’m sure, but I had to stop there. I couldn’t get away from my own thoughts.
Because in my marriage? Some days I look in the rear view mirror for so long, I forget to look back at the road in front of me.
I’ve never sugarcoated anything here, so you all know that our rear view mirror reveals windy roads, steep mountains, and potholes galore. It’s not a pretty picture, to say the least.
But the last few miles have been pretty great. And the road up ahead? Well, it’s clear skies and open road as far as I can see. Maybe a couple of twists and turns, but nothing like where we’ve come from.
Too often I get stuck looking in the rear view mirror and leaving my eyes there. I let the rear view cloud the view in front of me. And instead of being grateful for the open road ahead, I find myself grumbling about the things we just drove through, transferring the rear view to the forward view. Bringing the past into the present. And future.
Ugly. And foolish. That’s what it is.
So I’m determined to approach my marriage with a forward view, only glancing back in ways that will help us continue moving forward as a couple. It’s not fair to Jon, to myself, or to the Lord if I do it any other way.
Keeping my eyes focused on the road ahead, grateful for the present and looking with hope toward the future, that’s my prayer. Because let’s be honest, driving with eyes locked on the rear view mirror doesn’t end well for anyone.
Do you get stuck looking back? How can you move forward in hope today?
Kayse is a wife, mom, and founder of the Anchored Women community. She writes to help women fight busy, find rest, and build a life that’s anchored in Christ. Kayse is also the creator of the S.O.S. Planner, the Anchored Life Kit, and other practical resources that equip women to manage their homes and families in confidence. You can find her writing and her resources at anchored-women.com!
Ugh. I’d do good to have my rearview mirror surgically removed. Darn thing keeps me awake at nights sometimes. Great thoughts to start the week with. Thanks, girl!
Ooh is that possible? I could use mine removed too! 😉
I know yall are talking spiritually, but in the south, rear view mirrors regularly fall off due to the heat! So I’m sure it’s possible…if you put them in the refiner’s fire. 🙂
It is so interesting that you wrote about this. I keep hearing a one minute snippet on the radio about how one should not keep looking in the rear view mirror for very long…
I love it when God does that. 🙂 I’d heard this before, but it really hit me yesterday. I needed to hear it!