A couple of weeks ago, I took Emily to go see Annie Jr. She LOVES musicals, especially Annie, and so we made plans to go together as a mommy-daughter date. I knew she would love it.
We walked in and sat down in the front row, and got ready for the show to start. Emmy read every single word in the program before the lights went down and the musical began.
It only took about 7 minutes before what I was watching sent tears streaming down my face.
If you don’t know the story (though I’m sure you do), let me just give you a little background for a second. Annie is an orphan, living in an orphanage for girls run by a mean, harsh woman names Miss Hannigan. One of the first songs the orphans sing is called “It’s A Hard Knock Life”, and it’s literally about how mean Miss Hannigan is, how much she yells and how poorly she treats them.
When Miss Hannigan walked out & started talking to the girls, I legitimately started crying in that tiny little theater. Watching Annie Jr. with my six year old.
Because even though Miss Hannigan’s character is extreme & exaggerated, I saw myself in her.
I heard the things she was saying to those girls, and realized I’d said some of those things to my own children.
I heard her tone of voice and recognized it in my own, so many times.
I watched her impatience and irritation and knew that I’d been guilty of the same exact thing.
Only my life is not a musical, nor is it make-believe. It’s real, and my kids are real, and my struggle with my temper is a real problem.
Honestly, I never ever thought I had an anger problem before I had kids. And I didn’t! Life worked because I was really just in charge of myself, and I could handle that.
But these kiddos, they require so much of me.
They show me the worst parts of myself, just by existing! Just by living with me on a daily basis. Just by asking their questions and taking forever to do the “simplest” things. Just by being their own little people.
I love them. With all of my heart, I love them.
But I don’t love them perfectly.
And it took a silly musical, with an exaggerated character, to show me that something in my home desperately needed to change.
Because my kids need a mom, not a Miss Hannigan.
I do not have any fabulous solutions at this point, other than turning to Scripture again and again to get my exhausted, restless, overwhelmed heart back under His control.
And that is what I am doing.
It is helping.
Maybe you’re not a mom who struggles with anger. If not, then I applaud you, my friend. Yay for you!
But if you are a mom who struggles with anger & impatience, like I do, I want to tell you about the two things that are helping me the most:
1. My Bible & Journal
I’m diving into my She Reads Truth Bible each day, and am so grateful for the pure Word of God and the devotions in there. I’m writing out verses that remind me of TRUTH (and how to bite my tongue) and allow God to change my heart.
I’m also using my Gratitude themed Write The Word Journal to help remind myself of all God’s Word says about being grateful (instead of angry and bitter, you know?).
2. Podcasts on Motherhood & Faith
I tell you what, taking a few minutes while I’m driving, or folding laundry, or doing dishes to just fully listen to someone else speak truth to me does WONDERS for my attitude. My favorite podcast for motherly wisdom is Sally Clarkson’s podcast, but I also really love a few others. These can just be so encouraging & help me to remember WHY my words and attitude matter, and how important the state of my heart is when it comes to mothering my kids.
Check out my very favorite podcasts here.
Mommas, we do NOT have to give in to the anger that’s shown up in our lives since we gave birth to our precious, loud & crazy children. With the help of God’s Word, and a few great resources, we can change our families.
Here we go, angry, exhausted mommas. Together, arms linked and minds set on peaceful homes and hearts. Let’s do this.
How do you battle the anger in your home? Share in the comments below!