1. hi I have never followed the Duggars, just what you may see while waiting in line at the grocery store, or something you may see online so I can’t really comment on their life or situation. But what I can comment on is your article and I must say I completely agree. Non Christians seem to think us Christians think we are perfect, and I can honestly say that as a born again believer and follow of Jesus Christ I am so far from perfect that most of the time I can’t even see it. If I was perfect why would Jesus have had to die for my sin? I think that is what we need to be teaching our children, that without Christ’s blood we would never make it into heaven. We need our children and other non Christians to see that yes we sin, but Christ has forgiven us our sin and still loves us. The best way to show this is through our actions. Christ said to love our neighbours. That should be our message, Jesus Christ and his forgivenesses, not that we are perfect. Thank you for the encouragement of your article.

  2. I really appreciate what was expressed in this article. I’m thankful I serve a God that forgives. However, forgiveness doesn’t negate the fact that crimes deserve punishment. My heart aches for the girls. I don’t blame any of them at all for what happened, but I do have questions – Why didn’t they say something sooner? Why were they covering for Josh? This concerns me. Children should feel free and safe enough to tell their parents when something is wrong. My heart goes out to Josh. He was obviously a confused, frustrated and hurting young man. And my heart aches for these parents. We all wish we could always protect our children from hurt and evil. But as much as we try, we can’t. I hope this reminds us all to be humble when we talk about the decisions and choices we make for our family (homeschooling, having a large family, etc.) No one has a corner on “how it should be done”. May God give us His grace; each one of us is capable of great sin.

  3. Hi, I am visiting from Tuesday Talk. Thank you for speaking truth – Jesus alone is our standard of perfection. Amen!

  4. You’re right. We can’t be it all for our kids. And that is a terrifying thought. But to teach them and give them the tools they need – the Person they need, that One Who will always be with them, is what we can do. You’ve hit the nail on the head.
    Thanks for taking on this topic.

  5. Another aspect that I find disturbing is the number of Christians that are joining the world and the media and crying Crucify him!!!! The world is watching us. As Kaysee said, the world thinks Christians all believe they are perfect. The world is watching us. Instead of demonstrating to the world grace and forgiveness, we are salivating over this and ready to throw the entire family under the bus. we are shocked that such a thing could happen and we are angry at the Duggars for making “US” look bad. Well, the failures in this situation are not only those involved in the situation, but the Christian community. We failed. BIG TIME! EPIC! Coming along side the family does NOT mean we are letting Josh’s sin slide. It means we understand what it means to fail Jesus. We ALL sin. We need to say to the Duggars, “We will pray for you as you go through this. As Josh experiences the natural consequences of a sin. As the girls have to relive the tragedy. We will pray for you and pray that you handle this situation well.” Bottom line is, the knee jerk reaction of the world is understandable. But when the Christian community spits at their own, it is unacceptable. The message of the Duggars’ TV show, watched by millions, including non believers is now lost. In part because of Josh’s tainted reputation (whoever said it was alabaster anyway!) but also in part because the Community they represent has turned on them. AND we need to call out the media on this. Here is a young man, who has apparently confessed this, and whether justice was truly served or not, he admits he was wrong and is going through the natural consequences. By all means, media, let’s support the honey boo boos and the the wife-exchange shows and all the adult channels that air teen sex shows. Let’s listen to the senators that say pedophile should not be a crime. let’s support a president who leads a cult of men that think it is ok to marry, rape and mutilate 9 year old girls and sodomize little boys. let’s continue to support celebrities and politicians who get caught in sexual crimes all the time and show no remorse and are not held accountable. It’s time the Christian community stops being pacifists, and not only calls sin sin, but calls out the media when they show their double standards.

  6. So much well said. I am however disappointed in your short aside implying that having fewer children would have somehow allowed this to be prevented. First it it seems to blame the parents and second it ignores the fact that things like this go on in families with many fewer children. In fact in families with as few as two. I only have three children and can’t imagine having 19 but I’m certain this sin didn’t stem from one or ten too many children.

  7. Jane Tracy says:

    The only comment I have is… Josh may be a child of the King, washed in the blood…saved. But even for one of the saved folks — bad choices STILL have consequences and in some instances – punishment. Being a Christ follower does not get rid of consequences/ punishments of bad choices. Man-up and rejoice in Christ.

  8. I think you said my fears well. I can’t protect my children from everything. But like you mentioned I can lead them to Jesus and remind him that he is faithful. He helps us through any situation. This was a good post and I am also a fan of the show.

  9. I agree with everything you have said. As a mother of two young boys this scares me because how do you what your children will become or what issues they will face. I would love to think my boys are perfect and already strong Christians but I am sure the duggars felt the same way. I worry so much that I am doing everything right and will some how know if there are any problems that will ever need to be addressed but, what if it isn’t up to me? That is the FEAR! Truthfully what mother wouldn’t blame herself for the person her child becomes good or bad. Lord help us all to know what to do and when! For all the moms out there goodluck and know all of us mothers that care are working through the same desires and fears for our own children.

  10. Kasey, you have done an exquisite job of putting into words what I’m sure so many moms, including myself, feel about the Duggar situation. I have to respectfully disagree with you on one point though. And I hope you will not be offended by my opinion. It is expressed with a loving spirit. Your statement about how the word “mistake” implies it was an accident I feel would be inaccurate. The definition of mistake simply means an action or judgement that is incorrect or wrong. We all can and do make intentional mistakes when we choose sin over what is right in the eyes of the Lord. And for someone admitting to making a mistake simply implies that they know they did something wrong or made a wrong decision, regardless of wether or not they knew it was sin.
    Thank you for allowing me to share my heart. And thank you for sharing yours!
    Staci M.

    1. Alyssa Thys says:

      Yes, I’d agree. A mistake just means that it was wrong, not that it was unintentional. It was wrong. It was a mistake. It was a sin. It was a crime. Those terms don’t contradict each other.

  11. This post is TRUTH, girl! Thank you for so eloquently putting to words so much of what my heart, head and prayers express on a regular basis. I’ve read it through a few times already and will do so several more times. Dan Allender writes, “For most, trusting God means relying on Him to keep our body or our world intact. But that is not biblical trust at its essential core. Trust involves relying on Him for what is most essential to our being: the intactness of our soul. A return to the Father ensures that no one can shame or disgrace or possess our soul – that quintessential core of who we are that will live eternally with Him – no matter what is done to our body, reputation, or temporal security.”

  12. Kim Woodward says:

    Perfectly said!! Well done! I have been fighting this too! I love the Duggars, and we need to pray for them. Thank you for sharing!! All we all need is Jesus!!

    1. Anita Jones says:

      Thank you for this articule. I just wish people would stop perscuting this family. They are probley so brokenup at this publishity/ The “victums” need this to be closed so they can heal and Josh should not have to be punished for the rest of his life. If He has admitted this and has repented then stop all the clamar and let everyone get back to their lives. He will carry his actions for the rest of his life anyway. It’s time to forgive.

  13. Great post Kayse. I agree with you… seeing it all from a parents perspective is sort of terrifying. We aren’t in control as much as we think, so that’s where wisdom, and most importantly, believing and trusting God have to come into play.

  14. So well said, Kasey. My husband and I were discussing these very thoughts last week. We are all broken and we all need Jesus so very much.

  15. You put into words so many things I’ve been thinking. Well said. Really, this is the best thing I’ve read about the Duggars. Probably because it’s not really about the Duggars and actually about real life, which can be heart breaking. I’m proud of you for writing this and, more importantly, living this way.

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